okay, so this is probably gonna sound mushy and lovey...and well it sort of is in a way, but i just wanna take a moment to talk about my man. um yeah, you should probably get used to it or quit reading this blog since he is a rather LARGE part of my wonderful little life, and you will be hearing about him-OFTEN. i would also just like to say that this post may sound mean in some ways, but i don't in any way mean to sound that way, so just a heads up.
so anyway....
we knew that there were going to be some big adjustments when the man decided to come home, which didn't really worry me much, i worried more about him. one of my biggest worries was the lifestyle adjustment for the man, not to sound snotty, but he has been rather well cared for and to so DRASTICALLY change everything can be hard on anyone, especially those who are going through so much inner stress and turmoil. my biggest fear was the adjustment in lifestyle would make him regret his decision, i thought that adjusting from fulltime practice and school to fulltime work, and hard labor no less, would be overwhelming for him, especially since he has just been a fulltime athlete forever and has never had to wake up and go to work everyday. but boy was i wrong. he was so ready for this change, even more ready than i thought he would be. he is even more ready than i was. he wanted this so much more than any of us could have ever expected. and in these new changes, i have a newfound respect for my love. he is so much stronger and more courages than i ever could be. i am SO very proud of him. he gets up and goes to work everyday at 5:30. he works in a job with guys who are his complete opposites, and yet, he still has a good attitude, makes new friends. he's even already moved up on the payscale in just 2 weeks. to think i ever doubted that he could changeover so quickly makes me almost a little sad. i should never have doubted that he knew all along what he wanted and what it would cost him. it hit me today that this was so much bigger than what i originally saw with my little eyes. i take so many things for granted and tend to be so naive. but he obviously needed this so much that he was willing to sacrifice EVERYTHING. i don't know that even i could do that, but my joshua bear gave up his car, his freedom, his nicer lifestyle, all the things he's accustomed to, to come home and do what he needs to. i am so amazed by him, even more now than before. and each day he continues to amaze me. that boy is so very determined to DO on his own, and he has surpassed every expectation my narrow mind had set.
i am so very blessed to have such a strong man in my life, and i don't mean strength as in physical, though i won't lie, he is rather attractive with his big muscles. but seriously, he is so incredible. and i am so very lucky. he teaches me new things everyday and opens my eyes to how much bigger the world is. i can't believe that i'm the lucky one who gets to be with him. and he is so humble about how awesome he truly is, so i make up for his humbleness by boasting and bragging about him here. hopefully he won't mind....but who really knows since he hasn't yet discovered that this thing exists. but i don't really care, because my man deserves to know how much i truly love and appreciate him, since i can rarely find the words to get it out right. i love you joshua!
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