the best laid plans.

okay, i am not a crazy person who posts multiple times a day, but i am way super overwhelmed and frustrated at the moment and i have to do something.  everything that i have been working so hard for this last 7 weeks is totally in ruin.  Josh's grandparents are going to the game i am going to-not that i don't love them-but the WHOLE point was so there was NO ONE there and that he wasn't expecting anyone to come :( but now he'll be expecting them so my surprise will not mean nearly as much.  nor will we get to do all the cool things i had planned, or double date with leia and trey, or take josh away from his dorm and have a day trip or anything.  ugh. i seriously should have known it was all too good to be true, i didn't tell anyone cause i know its hard for them to keep secrets and now they have changed their original plans and are coming so everything i thought i did so good on is no bueno. i am super bummed out. and now i only have 5 little days to come up with something at least half way decent.  it won't even be a 1/3 of the greatness that my other plan was. it will still mean a lot to him i'm sure, but its not the same and i know it. it will not have nearly the affect that it was intended because there are going to be other people.  quite frankly right now i want to curl up in a large ball. i know that really doesn't help the situation, but i feel totally helpless, i can't call and ask them to cancel even though i want them too. i know they want to be there to see him too, but i always always always have to share when he's home. we never even get to have a date night to ourselves. EVER. seriously in the almost 2 years we've been dating i can count 4-yes 4 actual dates where we were COMPLETELY on our own somewhere at dinner or a movie.  he's never home long enough for us to go out for just us, and i understand that everyone wants to see him, but i thought this would be an actual chance for us to have some us time to talk and see a movie without a family with us or just have dinner like a real couple for a change.  looks like that is not happening until we're married at this rate. oh well, at least i will get to go and see him, it's better than nothing at all. but honestly this news has completely killed all of the excitement that i had this week. it's all shot. i'm still excited to go, i really want to see him.  but knowing that i have no us time and that i have to figure out how to keep more people quiet and find a new plan to surprise him just kills all of it and i feel rather defeated after all of my hard work.  so much for that lol, he did tell me i'd never be able to surprise him fully, and apparently he jinxed me pretty good, cause i had the deal all sealed and now its definitely not gonna work anymore.  hopefully i'll come up with something new, or maybe i'll get lucky and his information will be wrong, but i feel that the latter is not the case seeing as inside sources have already informed me otherwise.  bummage. i guess i'll check back in when i have more news. for now i'm going to go sit and mope and try to find something better and try not to cry lol.